I am married to a car guy. This means that any conversation, regardless of importance, is subject to interruption should the low (and often loud) rumble of a custom-car roll by. I have learned that this is not indicative of his interest in the subject at hand, nor does it signify a desire to be elsewhere, it is simply part of the nature of a car guy. It is as hard-wired into his makeup as reacting to baseball news is in me.
At any moment, that rumble can inspire a snap-like motion of his head to take in its source, and is soon followed by a recitation of numbers, liters, blocks, and turbos. Sometimes turbos have twins, and apparently there’s a lot of whining (whining is a good thing with turbos - who knew?). This information is delivered with a great deal of enthusiasm. I will never cease to be amazed by how, from a rumble, so much information is gleaned. I am in awe of this ability. For any car guy, knowing what propels the car is of utmost interest and importance.
Knowing what propels a car is important to car guys, and knowing what propels a person is also good to know about oneself. We are driven by so many different things.
Some are driven by a thirst for knowledge and understanding. These folks want, above all things, to understand what and why and how things, people, and ideas work. They are great researchers, hate to be unprepared for a meeting, and almost always know what they are talking about.
Others are driven by their desire for accomplishment. These folks are the ones that get things done. They stay a little late if need be, they dive into the to-do list at home, they take pride in their ability to accomplish, and show love by doing things for those that matter to them.
Some are driven by their sense of what is good, and right, and important. These are people who champion a cause and work to ensure that the marginalized are not forgotten, or that the least are cared for.
These are just a few examples. Others are driven by their desire to entertain, to create, to build, to bring forth something new.
What drives you? Is your life built upon your basic motivations? Chances are, if you are unhappy, or struggling, or unfulfilled, it may be that you don’t have your work and life aligned around your guiding principles and motivations. The good news is: with a little bit of knowledge and work you can.
Just as it doesn’t make sense to put a fuel-efficient four cylinder into a car that’s going to drag race, it doesn’t make sense to be in a job focused on details of you like to create new ideas; or put in charge of creating new ideas if you’d rather just have the details and get it done.
I would love to help you learn about yourself, and align your work with your values and abilities. Whining is great from turbos, but not so much from humans.
Your Partner In Spiritual Health,
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Hi, my name is Melissa Ebken, and I'm so glad you found your way here.
I am at home in the difficult spaces of peoples’ lives, willing to listen and to support those who work to grow themselves. I am a trained coach and have consulted with churches in conflict. Not your stereotypical minister, I embrace the Gospel with joy and laughter as I seek to help those around me grow in faith and understanding, always striving to leave people better than they came. An agent of wholeness, I create a safe space for people, especially those who have been marginalized, where they can understand how ridiculously loved and valued they are by God/Higher Power/Spirit, and to experience the difference that makes in life.
I started the Pursuing Uncomfortable Podcast to share the stories of people who have faced life's most difficult challenges, to inspire you to lean into and overcome your own. It's helpful to know that you're not alone in your struggles and to see how others have navigated similar circumstances. You can listen to it here.
Here's what I can do for and with you.