Blog Episode 25: Pursuing Finding Your Voice with Joyfully Cricket

Episode 25: Pursuing Finding Your Voice with Joyfully Cricket

05/04/2022


🎶 Podcast Intro: Welcome to the pursuing uncomfortable podcast, where we give you the encouragement you need to lean into the uncomfortable stuff life puts in front of you, so you can love your life. If you are ready to overcome all the yuck that keeps you up at night, you're in the right place. I am your host, Melissa Ebken let's get going. 🎶

🎶 Episode Intro: Hi friends. I want to share with you how humbled I am that you come back here each week to catch a new episode of the pursuing uncomfortable podcast. Thank you so much. I can't tell you what it means for you to show up here each week. Today I have a delightful person to share with you. Her name is Cricket. 
     And she goes by Joyfully Cricket, because that's exactly who she is. She uses music and intention, and joy, to help you create a life that you love to live. 🎶

Episode
Melissa Ebken  0:06  
Cricket Welcome to the Pursuing Uncomfortable Podcast.

Cricket  0:10  
I'm Melissa, hey, thanks for having me.

Melissa Ebken  0:13  
So glad you could be here today, I can't wait for people to meet you and hear your story and see what you do or hear what you do that might be more appropriate. So tell us a little bit about yourself and what you do.

Cricket  0:27  
Thank you. I am a spiritual life coach and inspirational singer songwriter. And I help my clients transform their life and live their joyful purpose. And I do that through creative coaching exercises, spiritual processes, mindset work, and also custom musical mantras that I write for my clients to help rewrite their belief systems.

Melissa Ebken  0:53  
Beautiful, we are kindred spirits. 

Cricket  0:57  
Love it. 

Melissa Ebken  0:58  
Me too. So before we get into your website, and how people can connect with you and work with you, I would love for, for everyone to hear your story. It was a beautiful story. not always an easy story. But how you have triumphed through that to where you are today is just amazing. Would you mind sharing some of that with us?

Cricket  1:22  
No problem at all. Thank you. So I usually start by saying that my spiritual transformation journey really started when I was 20 years old, and my then husband passed away of a drug overdose. And I do believe that all of our spiritual journeys start, you know, basically from birth. But that was when I really noticed a huge awakening for myself, and was really a pivotal moment in my life where I saw two paths ahead of me; one where I could follow the path of depression and drug use, and really kind of throw my life away because I had a trauma that gave me a really good excuse to not apply myself for anything else. But then I saw this other path before me of a life of joy, a life of meaning and purpose, because my husband didn't get to, you know, live out his life in the way that we all expected him to. So it really, the day he died was just this moment of really valuing how precious life is and deciding that I was tired of being sad, we were in a toxic relationship together. And it was just reached this point where I was just tired of being sad and letting my kind of self destructive tendencies have the wheel. And so it didn't happen overnight. But I chose the path of joy in life. And it really became, you know, although I processed the grief and it was devastating. Joy was kind of like this beacon, it was like a lighthouse off in the distance that I was I was slowly moving towards and it really just gave me hope. So even as I was processing, what had happened, I had this constant hopefulness that I was going to heal from it. And the way that, one way that I did that, was through my songwriting. So I've always been a songwriter, even since before I could play an instrument. I was writing little melodies. About whatever I don't know, I should pull out some of my old waldvogel scribbles, I have them somewhere. But I got my first guitar when I was 16. And I and I learned Cat Stevens and I remember my first guitar lesson, he taught me like one chord progression, and I went home and turned it into a song. So songwriting has really been something that has been a passion of mine for most of my life. And when my husband passed away, I had, you know, all this grief and all this time alone, and I just picked up my guitar and started pouring what I was experiencing into my songs. And what I know now I didn't know it at the time. But what I know now is that was a really positive way to process my emotions. It's something I teach to my clients and I practice for myself is really sitting with an emotion, not resisting it or pushing it away, but really looking at it and kind of being curious about it. And that's basically what I was doing in my songwriting. So I wrote these really tragic, sad songs, but they really were an opportunity for me to turn my experience into something beautiful. And for a few years, I sang those sad songs, but I continued on my spiritual growth journey of really just, you know, going to women's retreats and finding my spiritual community and reading any self help books I could. I discovered Byron Katie, who's one of my favorite teachers, and I just really opened up and grew into someone who really felt on purpose with life and as a result, those sad songs I was singing just did not align anymore. And I had this story that I told myself, that I only write when I'm sad. And I can only write depressing songs. And that happy songs are cheesy. And it wasn't until 2015, when I changed that story, I very intentionally decided, no, I want to be able to write happy songs because I'm a happy person. And I started writing songs about my spiritual transformation. I started writing songs about the law of attraction about, you know, our place in the cosmic universe and about passions and following dreams. And that ended up turning into, it just completely shifted my whole music, the direction of my music. So I became an inspirational singer songwriter, led to me putting out my first album in 2016, which was called The Calling, which is really all about me, believing in myself that I could, you know, live my purpose and discover my purpose and live my passions. And that's what really was the influence for me becoming a life coach. Because once I learned about life coaching, I realized I didn't have to just think about people following their dreams, I could give them the tools to do so. So I started coaching in 2018. And then just in the last year, I've started incorporating my music into my coaching, which is where the musical mantras come in. So I coach my clients on something they're wanting to shift in their life. And I create a mantra for them that they can sing to help anchor new belief systems that will help get them the results that they're looking for.

Melissa Ebken  6:40  
I love every bit of that. I mean, don't get me wrong, my deepest sympathies on the trauma that you went through. And I didn't mean to discount that at all. But how you honored your pain, how you honored the integrity and authenticity of your emotions through that time, how you found a way to sit with them and express them. That's one of my core values is we can't avoid the uncomfortable. But we got to lean into it. And then we can grow from it and overcome it. So thank you for that. And one of the things that kept coming to mind when you were talking was intention, and how that played a role in in your grief at the time and in your healing. And then later in how you affirm your gifts and use them to help others along the way. There were a lot of choices you made. And you were intentional about what you wanted, what your values were, and how that all went together.

Cricket  7:48  
Yeah, and you know, it's really interesting to hear you reflect that back. Because at the time, you know, this was actually it was just the 17th anniversary of my husband's passing. So this was in 2005. And at the time, I was 20 years old, I didn't know what I was doing, you know, and, and it's only now with the wisdom that I have, and the tools that I know, as a coach, and all the healing and growth that I've done over the past 17 years that I can look back and say, Oh, it was being with intention, it was sitting with my emotions. And yeah, just really in the past year, I've been able to reflect on how I was doing those things automatically. But now I can I can address those things with my clients, one on one and to do it intentionally, you know, it doesn't have to be for for the people that I work with, it doesn't have to be something that's on accident. You know, it's it's I'm all about being on purpose and living with intention and doing things with intention. So we can really co-create with source. And I mean, I feel like that's where, where the magic of life happens. You and me

Melissa Ebken  8:55  
You and me both. I would love to ask you more about the musical mantras in the affirmations that you have people create can we can talk about that for a little bit? 

Cricket  9:08  
I'd love to. 

Melissa Ebken  9:09  
I want to know more. And what can you help me walk through maybe a musical mantra I could use or an affirmation I could use in my life?

Cricket  9:17  
Yeah, absolutely. Do you want to hear one? Yes. Okay. So this one, actually, this one I didn't write specifically for a client. But I wrote it inspired from a friend of mine who introduced me to this book called The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks and he has this mantra in it and he so he calls it the Ultimate Success Mantra. And it was a wonderful book. I recommend anybody to read it. But as soon as I saw that there was an Ultimate Success Mantra. I was like, I'm turning that into a song. But I'll tell you that yeah, I'll tell you the concept behind them. So you know, everything starts in the mind. And so the one of the main things that I teach my clients is that, as you mentioned, you know, we can't control the world around us, right? There are circumstances that happen in life, like my husband passing away, that I was not in control of. But what I am in control of is how I respond to that. And how you intentionally respond to something begins with your thoughts. So, a circumstance happens, and then we have a thought about it. And that thought is what we create how we create meaning from it. So if you can identify when you're thinking about a certain situation, you will be able to see exactly either the result that you're getting that you don't want, or you can pick a thought that will create the result you're wanting to create.

Melissa Ebken  10:41  
So we can change our thoughts about a situation,

Cricket  10:46  
Exactly. And so that's a process I take my clients through. If there's something that they're wanting to shift in their life, we take a look at the thought the current thought that they have, and then and how it's getting them what they currently have. And then we go through a process that helps them create a more empowering thought that they actually believe that will get them the result that they're wanting. So the where the music comes in. So then I go from taking that coaching session that I'll do with my clients to come up with their intentional thoughts. And I'll go and I'll create a little song for them. And they're almost like little jingles. Typically, they're not super long. But they're something that you can use in your own daily practice, in your spiritual practice, as a way to anchor the new belief systems. Neuroscience tells us that when we have a thought it creates a groove in our brain. And then, you know, our brain being so smart, it wants to take the path of least resistance. So, if you have a thought that you've been thinking over and over again, your brain will automatically go to that the track of that thought. So if you have a disempowering belief or thought, which a belief is just a thought you keep thinking. So, if you have a disempowering thought, like, you know, I live in lack, or there's never enough, or I'll never find love, these are things that we all kind of have on default, collectively, I've found. Your brain will automatically go to that. And so with the mantras are the new intentional thoughts, we are creating a new neural pathway in your brain. And you just have to practice thinking it, right thoughts happen. And so it's not about getting down on yourself, when you have that old thinking pop up. It's about noticing it and saying, oh, there's that thought again. And here's my new intentional thought, I'm going to think instead. And so the I mean, as you know, music is so infectious, it is sound with emotion attached to it, which makes any manifestation really powerful. When you attach emotion to it, it sends that energy out into the field. And it gets stuck in your head. Right? You ever had a song

Melissa Ebken  12:53  
I'm biting my tongue so hard because you're speaking my love language. Neurobiology. Oh, I wanted to jump in 100 times, and I just want to, to note that self control out there then I want a little credit and acknowledgement.

Cricket  13:09  
So you know what, I'm talking about then?

Melissa Ebken  13:11  
Yes, in your brain, if you have emotion and habits, they come together forever in the migdela.

Cricket  13:18  
And, you know, that was one thing where and I will I promise you, I will get to the song. But I'm so excited to talk about this, because it was a big aha that I had when I was writing my old sad songs. But I was really living on purpose and living intentionally. And I just noticed, I was like, Oh, my gosh, we manifest what we think about and I'm singing all these old sound songs. Why don't I write music that uplifts me in the process, and ideally, the listeners too. And really, what I found is anything I think for myself, other people need to hear also. So the idea is that you get these songs stuck in your head. And then you sing them throughout your day and you're rewriting your your mindset.

Melissa Ebken  13:59  
Love it.

Cricket  14:00  
Yeah. So this one I love because it's, it's you're gonna hear it, but it's really expansive. And I also love because I kind of hang it on the end, it kind of doesn't resolve and so your brain kind of wants to keep repeating it. Oh, here we go over it. Yes. So this is the I'll sing it a couple times. But this is the ultimate success mantra.

I expand in abundance. I expand in success. I expand in love every day, every day, and I inspire others to do the same I expand in abundance I expand in success. I expand in love every day, every day, and I inspire others to do the same

Melissa Ebken  15:35  
Yeah, I expand, I want to add on to it. That was beautiful.

Cricket  15:39  
Right? Yes, thank you. The best is having my four and a half year old son like hearing him singing these these mantras and these lyrics that are like I am powerful, you know, I am worthy, I am enough, I expand in abundance. It's like being able to see those concepts not just for all of your listeners and us as adults, but for children as well. There's something so magical to me about sharing my music with children also, because I just know it's going to empower them to have really amazing growth mindsets for their whole lives.

Melissa Ebken  16:17  
Absolutely. If you have that tape playing in your head. That's just successful waiting to happen.

Cricket  16:24  
Yes, yes.

Melissa Ebken  16:27  
So cricket, tell me what you mean, when you say creativity for healing? I think I might know that when you talk about music. But do you tailor that for different clients in different ways?

Cricket  16:42  
Well, you know, the healing. Yeah, so the mantras are, are using creativity for healing, right. So it's whatever my clients are, you know, the struggle that they have around making changes in their lives, and, and taking, taking their thoughts, taking their desires, and using that as the muse for a musical mantra. You know, it's, I can't explain. And I wish that I had a coach that would write me a musical mantra, and I've done them for myself, that's how I even you know, came up with the idea. But the, the beauty of, you know, it's one thing to sing these these mantras and hear them and everyone does need to hear them. But there's something about a person sharing their heart, baring their soul and their struggles with me. And then me being able to take that and package it into like an empowering song. For them, it's their words. So when when my clients hear their mantra, it strikes, I mean, to say it strikes a chord is an understatement, right? It's like their higher self. I feel like Spirit works through me, you know, connecting with their higher, like I work with their higher self. So I've never put this into words before, but it's like working with their higher self, to give them this, this song that embodies what they're wanting to grow into. Right? 

Melissa Ebken  18:09  
I just had a vision come to mind that when you're looking at your reflection in a lake, and a pebble, not a big rock, but a pebble will come and cause some ripples, and will Achange it up. But then it comes back into focus again. That's kind of the image I get when you're talking about that, except it's not just coming back into focus, but it's focusing on a higher vision of yourself or a higher version of yourself or possibilities for yourself. And that's such a beautiful gift that you offer.

Cricket  18:41  
Thank you, I love the word possibilities, because that I feel like that's what I do. As a coach, I play in possibilities, I believe the possibilities for my clients before they can. And really any change that you want to make starts with your belief that you can make that change and believing that it's possible. So a lot of my clients come to me, you know, envisioning that they kind of can see a glimpse of the possibility, but they don't quite fully believe it. And so when I work with them, you know, I know I've seen so many transformations, and I've experienced so many transformations for myself that I can easily believe possibilities for people when they can't quite see it for themselves.

Melissa Ebken  19:23  
And I would imagine you have a lot of intuition that you use in your guidance in in your coaching practice. 

Cricket  19:30  
Oh, yes, that is intuition is one of my other favorite subjects, you know, other than creativity and music and mindset. Because I feel like when I really aligned with my intuition, and I set the intention, that's where it all started. I just set the intention that I was going to be more connected intuitively. My world just just really opened up and you know, creatively, it's really powerful to have that it's almost like a tool in my in my toolkit of having my intuition to be able to use that to guide me creatively. The other thing around healing through creativity, so I have a process, I love doing offering classes and workshops. And I kind of took, I created a class I did held it virtually for the first time in 2020. And it was called Harnessing Creativity For Healing And Joy In 2020. So it was like in light of the pandemic, and everyone was going through a lot of stress and fear. And so it was taking a subject that you find really painful. And I took them through a process of sitting with it, looking at it, naming it, and then flipping it. So okay, now that we've acknowledged it, what do you want to create instead, and then from that inspiration of that vision of what you want to create, instead, then people use that as the seeds for songwriting, an art piece, you know, some creative process, so they could, you know, take the pain that they're experiencing, and really transform it into a healing process, and create something beautiful out of it.

Melissa Ebken  21:09  
That's amazing. And you've beautifully described, what I hope to accomplish with the Pursuing Uncomfortable Podcast. My deepest hope is that someone who is facing something uncomfortable or facing something that seems difficult or impossible, will have the support and the encouragement and the inspiration to really lean into it. And let it be a part of their story of overcoming. Hmm, so to hear how you do that, I love it.

Cricket  21:41  
Thank you. Yes, I love how we we've just totally aligned,

Melissa Ebken  21:46  
for sure. And your website, joyfulpurposecoaching.com, I encourage everyone to go check it out. It's beautiful. And especially if you like the color purple. And make sure you scroll down, there are some beautiful images and creativity is at home with Cricket. And I think she will find the beautiful images in your life and in your story and help you to sing them and proclaim them and ultimately, and especially to live them. And while you're there, make sure you download the Joyful Purpose Visualization Guide. What a great tool.

Cricket  22:33  
Yes, I love guided visualizations. And that process helps you to envision what your joyful purpose is for your life. And then there's a guided meditation attached to it. So then you can live out that vision for yourself and use that as a tool and a practice for manifesting it in your life.

Melissa Ebken  22:51  
Wonderful. And if folks want to work with you, they can do that right there on that page. Again, it is joyfulpurposecoaching.com .com. Yes. Go check it out and click on the link to work with Cricut you'll not regret it. She's a beautiful soul. And I know that she will bring you to incredible places and offer new possibilities in your life. Cricket, thank you so much for joining us today. 

Cricket  23:19  
Thank you

🎶 Episode Outro: Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode. If this encouraged you, please consider subscribing to our show and leaving a rating and review so we can encourage even more people just like yourself. We drop a new episode every Wednesday so I hope you continue to drop in and be encouraged to lean into and overcome all the uncomfortable stuff life brings your way. 🎶


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Hello Friends!

Hi, my name is Melissa Ebken, and I'm so glad you found your way here. 

I am at home in the difficult spaces of peoples’ lives, willing to listen and to support those who work to grow themselves. I am a trained coach and have consulted with churches in conflict. Not your stereotypical minister, I embrace the Gospel with joy and laughter as I seek to help those around me grow in faith and understanding, always striving to leave people better than they came. An agent of wholeness, I create a safe space for people, especially those who have been marginalized, where they can understand how ridiculously loved and valued they are by God/Higher Power/Spirit, and to experience the difference that makes in life. 

I started the Pursuing Uncomfortable Podcast to share the stories of people who have faced life's most difficult challenges, to inspire you to lean into and overcome your own. It's helpful to know that you're not alone in your struggles and to see how others have navigated similar circumstances. You can listen to it here.
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